My initial thoughts around bullet journalling were mixed, very mixed. I think I owned my notebook for 2 weeks before I built up the courage to make a mark in it. I researched, made all sorts of lists and just didn't know what to do.
A qualifying statement about me is that I am very particular and I hate making mistakes, even when it comes to something as small as a spelling error in pen. I love writing in blue ink and on particular lined paper and I can't stand using white out. The idea of writing in a dotted grid notebook, with a black pen was already out of my comfort zone, on top of the fact that it was up to me to design what I wanted and what worked for me. But, this was something I was sure I wanted to try.
I'm not often shy when it comes to my anxiety and the ways that it affects my life but I don't always like to admit that it can affect my life in such tiny ways, like writing in a notebook with a pen. The second attempt at beginning my bullet journal went better. I had a plan, an idea of what I wanted and the courage to just get into it, however, I just could't keep up with it. I would start and stop, day after day. I was just so intimidated.
So here we are are in February of 2017 and I am on track. I use my bullet journal (though not as much as I am hoping to), I enjoy creating new spreads and various trackers, I change and adjust according to what I did you didn't like, and I am still nervous to make mistakes. I am in the most of creating a self care tracker in my bullet journal that I will happily share in a flip through of my journal (hint hint).
My take away from this experience is that although I often think I have a good handle on my anxiety, I am still affected and I still need to allow myself the time and space to adjust and overcome. These things take time and I am trying to work through them. Also, that I am not cured just because I don't have panic attacks thinking about the stranger I saw walking, what I think is, too close to the road but I am working towards the healthy management of my anxiety.
If you have any tips, trackers, or things that help you manage your anxiety or maintain positive thoughts/goals/lifestyle elements in your bullet journal or planner, let me know!
Love always,
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